Reclaiming your nervous system
At Wild Heart Therapy, we honour the messy, beautiful, and nonlinear process of healing. This isn’t about perfection. It’s about presence.
Because this isn’t just healing….it’s about reclamation.
And you don’t have to do it alone. So…let’s talk about it, what does nervous system regulation mean to you?
The truth is: real regulation isn’t about avoiding discomfort. And it’s not about staying calm at all costs.
It’s about learning to stay connected to yourself - even when you’re overwhelmed, anxious, angry, or shut down.
It probably isn’t going to be glamorous and it definitely won’t be quick.
It’ll be slow, subtle and will most likely unfold in the background of everyday life - quiet, steady, but deeply transformative.
What Actually Regulates Your Nervous System?
Spoiler alert …. it’s not what you think!
When we talk about “nervous system regulation,” it’s easy to picture someone deep-breathing on a yoga mat or sipping tea in a cozy corner.
While those things can support regulation, true nervous system healing goes much deeper than a calming ritual or a moment of mindfulness.
Real regulation is less about escaping discomfort and more about learning how to be with yourself, especially when things feel overwhelming.
It’s about retraining your system to recognize safety and not just in calm moments, but in the middle of real life.
Here are some of the often-overlooked, but deeply powerful ways to support your nervous system:
1. Allow yourself to feel discomfort
Avoiding pain is a natural instinct. But sometimes, true regulation means staying with your discomfort just a little longer, feeling it in your body, noticing what it’s trying to tell you, and giving it space to move through.
This doesn’t mean drowning in suffering, it means holding compassionate presence for yourself, even when it’s hard.
2. Use Regulation Tools as Daily Maintenance - Not Just in Crisis
Your nervous system needs consistency.
Instead of reaching for tools only when you’re spiralling, try building in small, supportive practices every day: gentle movement, breathwork, grounding, or checking in with your body.
These build resilience over time so you’re not starting from zero when things get tough.
3. Move Slower Than You Think You Need To
In a fast-paced world, slowing down is radical. By choosing to move slower, walking, speaking, or even thinking slower - you tell your nervous system: “We’re not in danger right now.”
It’s a simple but powerful way to shift from survival mode into safety.
4. Feel the Full Range - Not Just the “Good” Emotions
Trying to stay positive all the time can actually stress your system out.
What it really needs is permission!
Permission to feel sadness, anger, grief, joy, excitement. All of it. When you stop labelling emotions as “bad” or “good,” your body can move through them more freely.
5. Real-Life Connection Over Scrolling
We are wired for connection. Social media can offer distraction or even temporary validation, but it doesn’t nourish your nervous system the way real-life presence does. Eye contact, a warm hug, a shared laugh—these are regulating in the deepest sense.
6. Move Your Body to Move Your Emotions
Trauma and stress get stored in the body. Gentle movement - shaking, swaying, stretching, or dancing - helps release what’s stuck. Don’t worry about who’s watching, no one is watching - just let your body show you where it needs to go!
My biggest advice?
Keep it simple!
Your nervous system learned its patterns over years - through relationships, environments, trauma, and culture.
Unlearning those patterns takes time, compassion, and repetition.
It means celebrating the micro-shifts: choosing to breathe instead of shut down, reaching out for support, noticing when your shoulders soften or your breath deepens.
It’s about cultivating resilience, not perfection. And resilience means we don’t just bounce back—we build the capacity to be with more. More joy, more grief, more truth, more aliveness.
One breath, one choice, one step at a time.
